The Great Laundry Debate

I've become the subject of a lot of discussions lately. A big debate among married couples, really neither of them choosing sides, just making sure they were all against me. And my biggest nemesis when it comes to this debate: My mother.

Oh yes. Kathy herself has taken Tony's side and would break out a flip chart and powerpoint presentation if she had time between her Nana duties. The woman is obsessed and Tony loves it - especially since he's been rallying all of my friends against me.

Literally - the other night I left the room for three minutes and came out to a mob ready to tar and feather me.  Or in this case throw socks and towels at me. The topic spurring all of this chaos? Well that would be the fact that I don't do Tony's laundry.

I will now pause for your shock and awe.

Pause.

Pause.

Are you over it yet?

Fine, pause.

Okay, okay - it's not the end of the world people! He is a grown man who has two capable hands which have been doing his laundry for almost 31 years.  Okay, well he probably had a few in there in which his mom did them,  but I digress. Apparently I'm on the worlds worst wife list of 2011.

Laundry: Not my thing

My brothers and even sister and sisters-in-law have joined in on non-laundry wife doing bashing. Its become a topic of Family Dinner conversation, I'll even give you examples.

Family Member #1: Tony you should probably put Caitlin in the basement until she does your laundry.

Family Member #2: Yeah, maybe you should just throw your laundry on her until she does it.

Family Member #3: You should probably trade her in for a new wife, Tony. I mean she doesn't even mow your lawn and she's half Mexican.

Baby #1: Where's Tyson?

Family Member #4: Maybe there's a school you can send her to that will teach her these things like cleaning, laundry, and cooking.

Can you feel my pain? Fine - no I don't mow the lawn, but Tony enjoys a little bit of yard work and is obsessed with the cut of his grass.  I would just be criticized if I mowed a certain way - just like he double checks my work on the dusting and vacuuming.  And I'm not kidding - I think he likes to "work from home" just so he can re-do any of my work. 

On my other counter-points to not doing his laundry (is that a debate word, counter-point?): Our laundry baskets are in separate rooms. 

Not great? Yeah, that's probably why I was never in debate. That and because you had to cart around some suitcase like divider holder. 

Oh silly thin models, soap would ruin my heels and Tony already buys me things, silly.

Well Doesn't That Just Make A Wednesday

Edited to Add: So this was supposed to post last Wednesday, I'm not sure what happened, but think back to last week and this should all make sense.

The crazy weather continues in the midwest - and since I've been a midwesterner all my life, you would think I would be used to it by now.  But I can honestly tell you I can only remember having to "take cover" twice in my life: once when my parents basement wasn't finished and we wrapped up with blankets (and I'm pretty sure I didn't actually come upstairs for good two hours after the all clear, I wanted to be sure) and the other time was at school in the sorority house, where we made jokes about who was missing and how awkward it would be if something really happened.  I think where you can see where I'm going with that point.

Well the crazy weather started last night - and of course my luck with all things nutty around our house, Tony was out of town.  Oh yes, he was in the middle of Kansas - a place known to get hit by tornadic activity.  Leaves a girl a lot of time to think about how widespread those plains are.  But I was home with Tyson, and we've already hit our "too-much-time-without-dad" mark.  Really it consists of him whining at me, and my futile attempt at giving him the "mom stare."  Obviously it doesn't work on dogs and then I get caught yelling at him with my neighbors laughing at me - yes, that did happen.

But Ty and I had some bonding moments: watching the weather channel and waiting for the bad weather to approach us.  During this time I had Tony texting me asking me if it was raining or not - he also kept texting me the past few days asking if it was raining because "when he looked on the radar it was right over us." Um, what? Yes - weather.com does have pretty good accuracy when it comes to the rain or not, but when I'm looking out the window I see nothing - he believed weather.com over me, of course.

But I am digressing - apparently this crazy weather hasn't helped clear my brain or made me any smarter, sigh.

Tyson and I bonded over the bad weather - lucky for me it didn't start to get too bad until 10 pm - perfect. Right when the news starts and gives updates on the weather constantly.  Guess who was "saving money" and has the dish that goes out everytime it even sprinkles.  This girl.

Guess who doesn't have a weather radio but is going to get one immediately: this girl.

Guess who's dog is a freak and apparently afraid of thunderstorms: this girl.

And yes, I did imagine him with a German accent - however it also turned a little Austrian as well.

Yep - after jumping up and off the bed a few times, Tyson finally hid in the closet.  It was hard not to laugh at him, especially when you're home alone, but I did laugh - and thought it was pay back for all that whining he had to do earlier.  Who wants to go out side now, huh??

Anywho - that was my lovely evening on Tuesday.  What makes this Wednesday so wonderful? Well I got to hang out in the basement of the office with my co-workers for a few hours while sirens went off.  Lucky for us, we had candy.  But survive we did - however I don't know if Tyson handled the storm that well....he wasn't able to get into his closet.

Hopefully the rest of the evening will be uneventful: maybe just shopping around for a weather radio and new cable company and a non-whiny dog.

Joplin on My Mind

I can't stop watching all the news coverage on the tornado damage in Joplin, Mo.  I think if I hadn't had a lot on my To-Do List at work yesterday, I would have kept on watching the Today show, the Weather Channel and CNN.

My heart breaks for all of those families and Tony and I can't stop talking about how awful it is. In moments like these, I feel so grateful for everything that he and I have in our possession. We have each other, our families, Tyson and a warm place to call home. We have cars to drive and money to purchase food - we have our cell phones and Internet to connect with people and we have our house.  While putting away my work clothes yesterday, (yes Dad, I actually hung up my work clothes....see how far I've come!) I couldn't help but think of what if all my "worldly processions" were scattered around the city.

So while I'm able to attend a brutally hard work out class (literally my legs were shaking) and eat left overs, I am thankful for what I have in this world and have a greater appreciation for my family and friends.  This devastation in Joplin has affected Tony and I more than I thought it would. I think partially because Tony used to have that area for work.  He's driven past that hospital countless times, visited doctors' offices in that neighborhood.  For me, I've met the staff partner that lives in that area.  We've heard that he and his wife are alive, but their house is completely gone. He went straight to work trying to contact all his volunteers in the area and other staff members from neighboring towns went to help him.  This tornado's destructiveness has his Tony and I hard.

After chatting last night - while watching all the news coverage, it got me thinking about what he and I can do to help.  So I've looked up some things that maybe we'll be able to do soon. It's a small part of what we can do, and I hope you are able to do the same.  We've all been very blessed with what we have and I pray that we never have to see this kind of devastation.

How to Help:
SAFEANDWELL.ORG
www.safeandwell.org is a website that is currently listing over 100 survivors in Joplin, Missouri.
 
KANSAS CITY RED CROSS
An emergency blood drive is being held today, May 23, at the the Greater Kansas City Chapter from 2-7 p.m.  If you can't make it to today's drive but still want to help, visit www.redcrossblood.org
 
AMERICAN RED CROSS
1-800-Red-Cross or go to redcross.org to make financial contributions. The Red Cross is also accepting donations by texting REDCROSS to 90999. Officials are also looking for any assistance from medical personnel that can help with the efforts. Please go to showmeresponse.org for more.

COMMUNITY BLOOD CENTER
Blood donations are being requested throughout the week.  For information, go online to www.savealifenow.org or call 888.647.4040 to book an appointment.

HEART OF MISSOURI UNITED WA Y
Make a $10 donation to the Joplin relief efforts by texting "JOPLIN" to 864833.
 
HEART TO HEART INTERNATIONAL
Heart to Heart International is actively seeking cash donations, medical volunteers and care-kit items as a part of their initial response.
- Contribute financially: While Heart to Heart is rapidly responding to needs in Kansas and Missouri, it is asking local groups and individuals to make a donation by giving online at www.hearttoheart.org , calling 913-764-5200, or mailing it to 401 S. Clairborne, Suite 302, Olathe, KS 66062.

- Sign up to volunteer: At this time, Heart to Heart needs medical volunteers in Joplin If interested, please call 913-764-5200 or email volunteer@hearttoheart.org

- Pack hygiene kits: As part of Heart to Heart’s early response, it typically sends hygiene kits to disaster zones for people displaced for the storms. If interested, check out the care kit recipe on Heart to Heart’s website at www.hearttoheart.org
 
HUMANE SOCIETY OF MISSOURI

The Humane Society is sending a Disaster Response team to Joplin.  You can help with your monetary donations at www.hsmo.org


SALVATION ARMY
The Salvation Army says that financial donations are the quickest and easiest way to help tornado survivors at this time.  The money will be used to purchase food and supplies. To help Call 1-800-SAL-ARMY or go to www.salvationarmyusa.org . 
Also, Emergency Disaster Services Department are taking sign ups for volunteers that want to help. However, you must be trained before they send you into an area that needs help. They are sending volunteers that have been trained first and then others after completing training. Please call 816.471.4337 to sign up for training.

MISSOURI STATE EMERGENCY MANAGEMENT AGENCY
The Missouri State Emergency Management Agency is asking all Missourians interested in volunteering with the recovery are urged to call either 800-427-4626 or 2-1-1.  Monetary donations can also be made at those numbers.
Those with medical skills are also asked to  visit www.showmeresponse.org.  
 
MISSOURI MAVERICKS
Independence Event Center until 6 p.m. Monday, May 23.

NORTHLAND AUTO BODY AND TOW
Northland Auto Body and Tow is askin for blankets, bottled water, toiletries, canned goods, radios, tarps, flashlights, batteries and clothing to be dropped off at 64th and Chattham.  For more information call 816-741-2588.

UNITED METHODIST CHURCH
Woods Chapel United Methodist Church 4725 NE Lakewood Way, Lee's Summit, MO 6406 and Grace United Methodist Church in Lee's Summit 2400 SE 50 Hwy, Lee's Summit, Mo 64063--- Two United Methodist churches were severely damaged in the Joplin tornado, as was our district office there. In response, Woods Chapel and Grace are receiving items to help those in need. Items to be received are: • Chainsaws (this is a specific item requested by the Pastor at St. Paul’s) • Cases of bottled water • All varieties of batteries • Items for babies: formula, diapers and wipes • Towels and blankets • Fully assembled Fun Kits for children in gallon sized baggies. Suggested brand-new items may include coloring books, crayons, card games, bubbles, inflatable balls, play dough, etc.

It's Caca All Over

Well let's just say that if any of you have bets, a timeline or are really hoping that Tony and I will announce that we are expecting a little bambino soon - good luck. It's not happening. And it's not happening for a long, long, very long while.

Why you ask? Well, let's just say that there was a defining moment in the "Adventures of Auntie Cait Babysitting." A very defining moment with caca. Or for you white friends, poop. Literally all over my leg, sock and a little man named Dylan, aka the caca divo.

Our adventures began pretty well - you know favorite auntie stuff - and a great long mimi (nap) for both boys.  OH yes, I had two of them and I am thanking my lucky stars that Chunk-O-Rama is pretty immobile. Heck, we were even doing so great yesterday, we ran, well I huffed my way up to my sisters with the boys in a high-tech jogging stroller, and made our way to the carnival in Olathe.

You know, one of those traveling carnivals like the ones in the creepy serial killer shows and movies? That one - but in Olathe and with cleaner looking rides. But for the five little monkey nephew dare-devils, it was perfect. And yes, I did join in the rides and would have gone back for more.

All was good. Happy boys and clean pants.

Then it hit. Literally after wanting to change D's diaper, chaos ensued.  Of course I got a hug from him before - I think he was trying to avoid what was going on and helped by putting his stucker (sucker) in my hair. Apparently I should have taken that as Strike 1.  But looking back, I would have taken that over what came next.

Caca hit the fan. Well, maybe not the fan, but my leg, the bathtub, my sock and up D's back. Ugh. And thinking it would be easy to throw D in the tub did not work. Apparently the tub + D = screaming bloody murder. I kind of wanted to join him if I knew what the issue was.  But I didn't - and dealt with the stinky caca.

We were able to get cleaned up, in clean diapers, a leg wiped off and socks thrown inside out. And then he told me he was hungry.

Ugh. Well at least I know the bloody murder screaming would be done.  I was also able to see his molars - and they appeared cavity free.

So for now, Tony and I will be waiting to have kids.  Lucky for us, moments like these remind us that we are thankful to have nephews and Tyson.  They are handful enough.

I apologize if I was not up to par on my funny this post. I feel that I am still traumatized over the caca. However Dylan and I are on good speaking terms, but I won't let him know Chunk was my favorite for a few minutes.

Someone should warn my Sister-In-Law

It's become more apparent that my culinary skills are not just lacking....they are not even close to what a two year old can even do. I'm not kidding. My evidence:

Oh and it was hard as a rock too

That my friends, is a hot dog. My sister told me it looked like poop when I texted it to her. Apparently you should cook hot dogs in the microwave for 30 seconds and not two minutes. When you cook it for two minutes, it turns out like a turd (sorry Mom).

So I'm throwing this out there to my sister-in-law: you should probably have the kiddos meals prepared before I get there. -Oh yes, I'm watching two of my nephews (for a while) on Saturday. I'm pretty sure at least two meals will be consumed by them. Which means I'm in trouble.Of course, I always have leftover bread from our last barbecue.  You can give hamburger buns to babies right?

Ugh. Utter hot dog fail.  I guess that's how my Monday is going.  Not only was my computer infected by a virus, but I was as well. So the hot dog fiasco was just the mustard on the bun. Good thing I had extra to put in my Velveeta and cheese. Somehow when I am sick and Tony is gone, I start to crave mac and cheese.  Cause nothing says get better than processed cheese.

Yep - that's a hot dog joke. But really I'm taking this chance to catch up on my blogging.  I may even have a few written and schedule them out so you may have a little treat to read this week.  But don't get your hopes up, in between my sentences I'm hacking like a 86 year old smoker.  Don't you want to be over here with me? I'll make you a hot dog.

Happy Day of My People

Today marks a glorious day.  A day where the white people in the world use a little excuse to eat tacos, cheese dip and drink tons of tequila.  Okay - well they do that a lot other days, but Cinco de Mayo is a better excuse to do all of the above.

And you better believe I will make my way to a taco or two today!

Of course, marrying an Italian leaves me with a little education to do. For him, it's all pasta and meatballs all the time - and for me, I could eat Mexican every day.  He's still getting used to that - especially since that's about all I cook.  But he's catching on quickly, already eating salsa on his eggs, soon I'll have him eating pico de gallo. Yum.

But enough about my culinary skills. Here is a little history about Cinco de Mayo.And since I'm not a history buff, I of course googled it. So raise your glass to the French and thank them for losing a battle, but I will of course thank them for wine.

When You Give A Mouse A Cookie

We all know that book - I mean, I'm pretty sure that I've even written about it here. But I was once again reminded of the tale last night....when Tony went to Target.

When you send a Tony to Target....he's bound to buy a lot more than expected.  Like Costco size toilet paper, toothpaste, and hand soap.

But what made Tony's trip to Target even better - he bought his "summery" shirts.  Oh yes, Zoolander invaded Tony's body and he needed to stock up on his summer wardrobe of t-shirts.

And yes, he did in fact model every one of them for me.